Connectworking 1.0: Redefining Networking Through Authentic Connection

Over the past decade, I’ve had the privilege of speaking to more than a hundred people about networking—what it is, what it isn’t, and why so many of us avoid it. Each time, I ask a simple question: “How many of you intentionally practice networking?” Only 5–10% raise their hands. And yet, almost everyone nods when I ask whether networking is important.

So if we understand the value, why don’t we follow through? I believe the answer is simple: Most people misunderstand what networking really is. It’s not collecting business cards or messaging strangers on LinkedIn. It’s not asking for favors from people you barely know. And it’s definitely not transactional.

So I’ve reframed it with one small shift that changes everything: Networking → Connectworking. Because when you begin with clarity—about who you are, what you want, and how you want to show up—connection becomes natural, human, and purposeful.

The First Shift: Asking for What You Need Is Your Responsibility

When I lived in Brazil more than a decade ago, I noticed something beautiful yet challenging about the culture: people hesitate to ask for help. Not because they’re shy or unambitious—but because they worry the other person won’t be able to say “no.”

The internal narrative goes something like this: “I don’t want to put them in an uncomfortable situation. What if they say yes out of obligation?”

But here’s the truth: Other people’s ability to say “no” is not your responsibility. Your responsibility is to voice your needs, your goals, your aspirations. No one else can do that for you. And until you ask, the answer is already no.

This mindset shift is foundational to Connectworking. When you remove the emotional weight around “the ask,” you free yourself to show up truthfully and respectfully.

Why Connectworking Matters: Opportunities = Weak Ties × Ability to Connect

A decade ago, research from the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics shows that roughly 70% of jobs come through networking, and the percentage is even higher at senior levels. Why? Because opportunities travel faster across weak ties.

Strong ties—your closest friends, family, and inner circle—often share the same information and networks you do.

Weak ties—people you know lightly or periodically—connect you to new networks, new information, and new opportunities.

Think of weak ties as bridges whose other side you can’t fully see yet. You just know they lead somewhere you couldn’t reach alone. That’s why your ability to connect—not just your LinkedIn count—shapes your access to opportunities.

Everybody Is More Connected Than They Think

The old “six degrees of separation” theory isn’t just folklore. Microsoft (2009), Twitter (2010), and Facebook (2011) all validated it using real data. We truly are only a few connections away from almost anyone in the world. Which means: You’re never as far from opportunity as you think—you just have to be willing to reach out.

Connectworking Starts With Identity, Intention, and Openness

Your ability to connect deeply and meaningfully rests on four pillars:

1. Know Yourself (Your Personal Brand)

Who are you?

What do you stand for?

What value do you bring into the world?

When you’re grounded in your identity, connection becomes authentic—not performative.

2. Know What You Want (Your Goals)

Clarity is magnetic.

People can support you only if they understand where you’re headed.

3. Learn a Framework

Confidence comes from structure.

Tools like the 20-Minute Networking Meeting give you a practical way to initiate conversations without overthinking them.

4. Open Yourself to Others

This is where emotional intelligence meets courage. Someone once asked me whether empathy is the key to connecting. And yes—there are many ways to make people admire you or feel drawn to you. But true connection doesn’t come from fascination. It comes from vulnerability. When you open up—honestly, humbly, authentically—you create resonance. People respond not to your perfection, but to your humanity.

So, Get Started—Or Give Yourself Permission Not To

Write down what you want. Clarify who you are becoming. Use a framework that helps you connect with intention rather than anxiety. And if you’re not ready? If today is not the day?

It’s okay to say: “I’m not ready to do this right now.” Courage, serenity, and wisdom come in waves throughout life. Some seasons are for reaching out. Others are for grounding, healing, or preparing. But when you are ready—Connectworking can reshape the trajectory of your life, one authentic conversation at a time.